By: lifestor | Oct. 12, 2020, 11:28 a.m.
When I was a kid, I loved playing with soda bottle caps. I used to collect as many as I could and arrange them as I liked. Most of the time I arranged them as class students because outside my home life school was my only other social institution. Coke and Krest bottle tops were male students whereas fanta, and sprite bottle tops were female. I loved the holidays because it meant more bottle tops for me. Well, I have no idea where the others went after the holidays were over but I was all good with new bottle tops every new year. Although I was happy with my bottle tops, I saw it as very childish and year after year I kept asking myself when I would grow up, and if I did, would I still play with the bottle tops? It was always a worry that I have no idea of how I got over. I don’t play with bottle tops anymore nor do I have the desire to collect them as I did back then. That is how I would define growth.
From my late teens to my early 20s, I reluctantly but surely believed that life was predefined. From birth to school from school to college from college to an average paying job, then marriage, raise kids, retire from job and raising kids then live my final years waiting for the inevitable, death. The was a straight line I drew and would follow through and anything beside that was a mistake, a failure and a disappointment. Well, not until my life had a different turnout from what I had expected. I realized there was more to life than what I had planned. There were things that were better off done different from what I knew and that brought me to understand change.
My point is as much as we would say that people don’t change, I personally see a difference in myself as I grow. Difference on how I relate to people now from how I did before. I now know what is good for me and what isn’t. Who is good for me and who isn’t. What sits well with my loved ones and what doesn’t. How my actions affect other people and how I want them to treat me based on my actions. Growth is personal realization of things we have to do or not do anymore whereas change most of the time is influenced by our environment and the people that we associate with. We learn as we go and change as need be.
From the lyrics ‘The Reason’ by Hoobastank, the writer of the song regrets having had a negative impact to the life of someone that cared about them simply because they were not keen enough to realize that some of the things, they did had an effect on them. This isn’t new for most of us. Sometimes we do things thinking that we are not hurting anyone but we end up hurting most of the people who love as unconditionally. The truth is, we are not perfect, there are some of our imperfections that can be changed or need to be changed but do we listen? No way, “but that’s just how I am,” is our response. So rigid so self-centered. Until the people who want the good for us leave us on our own and that is when we realize that we should have listened more and been a little less stubborn.
Truth is as rigid as we are, most of the time we mean no harm but that is mostly inevitable. Change is good sometimes as long as we are not changing our personalities. All I hope is that we realize what needs to change within us before it is too late and we lost the ones that bring out the best in us. We should realize that as we grow, we continue learning.
The Reason by Hoobastank - https://youtu.be/fV4DiAyExN0
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