Strength Through Disappointment – Elastic heart by Sia

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  • By: Brenda_Otin | Nov. 1, 2020, 3 p.m. | 0 Comments

    Today I hurt for the same reason I did yesterday and the day before that. The trend is always the same, another one bites the dust, but for some reason I never seem to get it. For some reason I end up in the same situation over and over again. Even with so many red flags. Am I too stubborn to accept my fate or is it that misery just loves my company? I tend to trust easily when I know I should not. I see only good when I know there’s also an ugly. I forget I am not a special case and everyone is trying to fight for what I am fighting for so I got no advantage, but oh no! silly me thinks the universe holds a special spot for me.

    As much as I do end up in the same old place, slowly but surely, I learn a thing or two. Maybe I didn’t accept it immediately but sure today was better than yesterday. It hurt less and I realize I am growing a thick skin and an elastic heart. With my shred of hope I know tomorrow or the day after that, perhaps a year from now I will be tough enough not to fall victim of these things that I am too stubborn to let go. Maybe I will remember what it takes me to go through it and so I wouldn’t get myself into it again. My strength is gradually growing. I have become as elastic as a rubber band, only when you pull harder, I will snap. Having been here before I should know that I cannot fight this war without weapons. Sadly, I always forget, get back to the misery over and over again, but I know soon, I will grow a thick skin and an elastic heart.

    The trend is always the same and the earlier I spot it the better for me to avoid another misery before it gets me. This time I should let another bite the dust without bringing me down with it. Nothing ever goes my way; I have reluctantly accepted that and maybe it has been for the best. However, I want to accept the facts of life without a tear in my eye. I want to fully learn how to adjust to the universe’s preference for my life. I want to go to bed satisfied with my day and not haunted by my past, not thinking about what I should have done different, not thinking about how I acted or should have acted to get a call back or to be missed or needed, all I need is a thick skin and an elastic heart. Because I know it always happens and by now, I should be used to it and brush it off like it is nothing but I know sooner or later I will. I shouldn’t let it affect me but it does. I want my life back. I want to be free as I was when I was just a kid. I worried less, maybe, but worry wasn’t part of my life. I barely had the what ifs. Maybe I am just scared of what I don’t know, but who knows anything anyway?

    Maybe I am overthinking, but I need to think of all the possible outcomes, that way I will be prepared for any kind of outcome, yet at the back of my mind I am certain of what’s to come. If only I was tougher, if only I had a thick skin and an elastic heart, then I would be free and happier. All I want to tell the universe is that I got a thick skin and an elastic heart and you won’t see me fall apart.

    Elastic heart by Sia -



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    Sometimes it is not the song that makes you emotional, it is the people and things that came to mind when you were listening to the song.

    Have you ever heard a song and wondered how much the songwriter knows about you? Music speaks to us through lyrics (well, including Carlos Santana’s guitar)...